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AXXIS – ReDiscovered (2012)

Shame!
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German rockers Axxis must have a fanbase, as they are still around after 20 or so years. But you seldom hear them discussed in any detail. Sadly they might now be discussed more than ever for all the wrong reasons.
Once again a band has taken time out of writing new material to delve into the murky waters of recording covers. And once again a band has found itself delving into some truly horrendous choices for songs to include.
This album is another real WTF moment. I mean covers of Boney M, Celine Dion and Opus. Opus????


The guys narrowly get away with a fairly straightforward cover of the Yes classic Owner Of A Lonely Heart, but Boney M is just horrifying. Boney Bloody M! Hideous.


And when they take on The Bee Gees and the predictable Staying Alive, well…they do it seriously! Can you believe that?! Sorry guys, go check out Dweezil Zappa & Donny Osmond’s cover – now that’s how you do the Bee Gees.


Their Kraftwork cover it just plain shit. Billy Idol’s growling hit White Wedding has zero menace and on the Phil Collins cover it sounds like the singer has his balls in a vice.
I could go on, but I won’t. Well I will, but only so far as to mention My Heart Will Go On, which it possibly won’t after hearing the cover of 

Celine Dion’s monster tear jerker. The only thing being jerked in this case is the patience of this band’s fanbase. The vocals here are absolutely ghastly.
The album closes with a Kiss cover of I Was Made For Loving You that the Village People couldn’t have done in a more feminine way. Awful.


Sack management. Fire the label. It’s the only way out for Axxis. I can’t imagine one single fan being impressed by this load of old cobblers.